Waiting in line at the aquarium now. It's hot and i'm sweating and i don't understand why there are so many people...this line never ends! But downtown dallas is pretty sweet so...I guess it evens out.

Like A Fuck You For Christmas, This Gift Is A Curse

I love Nike.  I really do.  He's adorable, smart, a good boy, and did I mention adorable?
He was a bit resistant in the beginning of his agility training this morning, but near the end he started getting everything super fast.  Afterwards my dad took us to get slushees, but I just stole some from Jenny :P

Anyways, today's big plan is the Dallas Aquarium with an old family friend who's driving down from Denton to hang out with me and my sister.  Should be fun :)

So i'm trying out mobile blogging...

Rewrites, Model Houses, & Video Premieres

I'm writing my own version of Eminem's "Deja Vu." I'll let you know more later ;)

Today consisted of hanging around the house and swimming all day until around six in the evening when I got picked up and taken to Northpark Mall.  Browsed a countless number of stores, fell in love with a countless number of clothing/shoes/accessories.  What can I say? I'm easily woo'ed by material things sometimes.

Here are some things that I found today:

(Baker's)

(Burberry)

(Betsey Johnson)

(Victoria's Secret)

Oh I wish I had the money and the body shape to have all of these marvelous things.

In other news, Eminem's new music video for his hit single duet with Rihanna, "Love the Way You Lie" debuted today with Megan Fox and Dominic Monaghan.  I liked it, although I don't believe it's his best video.  I honestly feel that "Way I Am" is the best one...I'm not sure why.  It was the first music video I saw with an Eminem song...Maybe it's purely out of nostalgia?

Anyways, here's the video:

Pessimism is an emotion, not a philosophy

I keep wondering if I made a mistake.  If I should have stayed.
But then I go: "oh no! don't be silly, you've had a great 2 weeks home again!  You have a full ride to the university and you're living with some of your best friends on campus! Why the hell are you complaining?"

And then I remember "Oh right.  I decided to major in Chemistry.  The subject that I find fascinating but have only taken one class in (in my sophomore year)."

I've done the pros and cons countless times.
Chemistry (PRO): I like it. Good opportunities.  Great schools both here and and in Umeå.  Leads to a great paying job if I work hard.
Chemistry (CON): I'm not sure if I'll still like it.  I'm stuck here for 4 years if I do it most likely.  It doesn't exactly feel like my true calling.

MusB (PRO): Feels natural.  That dream that I've always had.  I'd work for it.  It could take me around the world.
MusB (CON): Education only offered at few locations.  Extremely competitive.  No guaranteed pay for many years.  I will most likely be broke and struggling to make ends meet while relying on my parents for help sometimes.


WHY IS THIS SO DIFFICULT.

Call me weak, call me coward

Feeling better.  Especially now that I've talked to my buddies ;)

My back is still super sore just where the shelf hit me, but I guess it's fine...
Either way, I had a good evening despite my (semi-self-inflicted) misfortune.

I ended up cleaning for a while and then in the evening me and my brother took Nike to the park and played a bit of soccer.  Damn, that dog can run.  We had so much fun running from him while passing the ball to each other.  But as things riled down, I ran into a friend of mine and we ended up catching up for a bit before splitting ways and heading home.

Swimming has become a daily activity, and yesterday was no exception.  Swam and then started the movie Cloverfield (looove Marlena) but it was too creepy for my little brother so we watched The Proposal instead and decided to continue Cloverfield today while light out.  The Proposal is actually a supercute movie, I like :)

Todays big plan: THE DENTIST. Dum dum dum.

Depressed and Sore

Today, as I was cleaning my room, I decided to push the sofa bed back into a sofa.  Everything went well until I realized I hadn't pushed it up all the way.  I had already pushed the sofa up against the wall but I didn't think twice about it.  So I pushed it again to make it sit more upright.

Basically what happened next was I accidentally pushed the things that hold my shelf up and three shelves and two metal bars came crashing over me.  I covered my head as everything fell but a wooden shelf fell on my back and I just felt flashing lights of pain for a few seconds before it numbed out.

The aftermath.

I've been so stressed these past few days and I guess the shock and the repression of emotions or something just threw me off guard and suddenly I was crying and I just couldn't stop.  It was really depressing.

What was worse was that I later found two marks on my guitar where the shelf hit it.  The 50 dollar kids acoustic guitar was totally unharmed, but my 600 dollar electric was of course damaged.  Which caused more tears of frustration.

Now my back is sore, my guitar is damaged, and I am determined to clear out the shit in my room that I have borrowed, do not use, or just plain do not want.  If I had less stuff then I would have more room and this entire thing would not have happened cause I would not have had to fold up the sofa bed.

UGH.

I'm so pissed.  My guiiitaaaarr :(